Stupid Human Tricks

I just saw a news segment in which a man can protrude his eyeballs out by an amazing ** mm.

He says he wants to get certified in the Guiness Book of Records and then join a travelling circus.

I am dumbfounded, as I do a mental inventory of my unusual bodily talents.

1. I can wiggle my ears.

2. I can raise my left and right eyebrows independantly.

3. I can wiggle my nostrils.

4. I can whistle without moving my lips.

5. I can grow half a beard. For some reason, the other half of my chin doesn't want to grow a beard.

Which of these can earn me a living?

Moving further south ... much much further ...

Ha.

Maybe my talent can be NOT doing something.

Go me. I am indeed a God of Small Things.